Gossipy coworker keeps track of colleague’s time off, complains to others about their approved absences, and invents his own hardships for sympathy: ‘That family situation he referenced didn’t exist’

Author image for Etai Eshet
Etai Eshet • Editor
May 26, 2025 10:00 AM EDT

The workplace is known as the glittering utopia where everyone minds their own business, supports each other's life struggles, and definitely never invents grievances with people they barely know. 

But this one coworker decided to change that. This is the type who barely knows your last name but has somehow made tracking your sick days their personal side hustle. This self-appointed guardian of attendance monitors your time off with the intensity of a customs officer at JFK. And while their colleague is managing real-life turmoil—actual family crises, legal headaches, the kind of stuff that makes Google Calendar weep—and still, managing to keep everything by the book, their supervisor on board and their conscience clear.

But the coworker, who rarely minds their own business or their actual job at hand. Instead, they're the kind of workplace theater kids desperately seeking a main character moment. Checking who gets sympathy, who takes leave, and who dares to show the faintest sign of vulnerability. 

The rumor mill turns, loyalty is measured by attendance, and empathy is replaced with quiet grumbling about fairness

And for their main act, the big moment that'll get them the leading role, they decide that falsifying their own sob story for that extra dash of martyrdom will do the work. because who doesn't love a sympathy arms race in the break room?

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  • "Coworker I barely interact with has a weird grudge about my time off"

    "He regularly complains about me, especially when I take time off"
    via Yan Krukau

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • I'm keeping this vague in case anyone from work happens to see it.
    via IAmTheGripper
  • There's a coworker―let's call him J-who started shortly before I did. We've only had brief, surface- level interactions, but somehow he seems to have a problem with me.
    via IAmTheGripper
  • He's never said anything to me directly, but I found out through someone else at work that he regularly complains about me, especially when I take time off.
    via IAmTheGripper
  • Cheezburger Image 10509857024
    via izusek

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • The past year or so has been rough for me personally. Without getting into too many specifics, I've had a couple
    via IAmTheGripper
  • of major life events back- to-back that required me to take some time away from work-things involving close family,
    via IAmTheGripper
  • legal matters, and eventually, the passing of a loved one I was extremely close to.
    via IAmTheGripper
  • Cheezburger Image 10509857536
    via A and N photography

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • I always communicated everything clearly to my supervisor in advance, and they've been completely
    via IAmTheGripper
  • supportive, telling me to take whatever time I needed to handle personal matters.
    via IAmTheGripper
  • Despite this, I later found out J had been talking to another coworker, making comments like, "Other people are dealing with
    via IAmTheGripper
  • stuff too but still show up to work." At one point, he even said something along the lines of, "My family
    via IAmTheGripper
  • member is in bad shape too, but I'm still here." But here's the thing—I later learned that wasn't even true. That family situation
    via IAmTheGripper
  • he referenced didn't exist. It was just a way to downplay what I was going through and make me look bad.
    via IAmTheGripper
  • To top it off, while I was on officially approved leave, I received a strange text claiming to be from someone higher up in the company, asking if I was coming in for a meeting.
    via IAmTheGripper
  • Turns out, after some checking, that message didn't actually come from who it said it did. Still not sure who sent it, but the timing was... suspicious.
    via IAmTheGripper
  • I've never been anything but polite and professional at work. I keep to myself, show up when I can, and have always tried to handle things maturely.
    via IAmTheGripper
  • Even the person J complains to has said I'm one of the calmest, most patient people they know.
    via IAmTheGripper

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Tags

management boss workplace-stories hr toxic-workplace manager bosses work PTO managers supervisor workplace Horrible Bosses work-life balance
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